Do I Accept?

People use Facebook everyday. They log in just to see who wrote on their wall or left them a message. Facebook also has a great search feature so you can find anyone who has a facebook account even if you are not friends with them. The first thing im sure most users do when they log on is answer any outstanding requests they may have such as a friend request.

So imagain one day you log in and you have a friend request and it is someone you have never met but they have searched Facebook, found you, and for some reason they friend you. When you go to answer the friend request many questions go through your mind. Should you or should you not accept them? Thats a hard decision when you don't know the person. However, what if this person has your same last name? Maybe somehow you could be related? What do you do?

I ask this question because recently my roommate came to me and told me about her cousin who was friended on Facebook by a boy with their same last name. She accepted the request to find out that this boy search Facebook for people with his last name. Both the boy and my roommated cousin became curious as to whether they were related. They began talking through Facebook and found out that they are cousins. He lives in Rome where some of her family is from. They have continued to talk to find out more information on the family relationship. They also plan to use Facebook to stay in touch with one another.

This story goes to show how computer mediated communications can be a great thing. You could contact a part of your family you might not have known about or you never thought you would talk to and you can get in touch faster and easier with people from across the world. Also in my electronic communications class we have been discussing how people rely and use CMC so frequently these days, that when my roommate told me this story about how her cousin met their cousin on Facebook, she was reading the story from a message on Facebook that her cousin left her.

Although this story of friending people on Facebook and accepting friend request does have a happy ending, there are instances where friending someone and letting them view your information my be harmful. I would like to hope that people use communication through CMC the right way and not for the wrong reasons. So if you go searching for a friend maybe make sure to leave them a message of why you are asking them to be your friend or about who you are.

Online Student Teacher Relationships?

I came across a story that CNN posted about online student teacher relationships. http://www.cnn.com/2008/TECH/08/12/studentsteachers.online/index.html The story was about teachers creating these accounts on Myspace and Facebook and “friending” their students…and about a Missouri legislator sponsoring a bill banning elementary school teachers from doing so. It was very interesting and caught my attention immediately because for my Electronic Communications course my professor created a Facebook account and "friended" all of the students in the class. Before reading this article I didn't not think that a teacher friending a student could be wrong but it does have its positives and negatives.

The story brought up some topics we had discussed in my communications class about how the Internet can be abused and people may use it in the wrong way. A teacher friending a student can be good for reasons like opening up a different line of communication and making the student feel more comfortable. However like the story says a teacher is not meant to be a friend. I don't know if I consider communication with a teacher over the Internet to be a positive way of communicating because teachers should be encouraging students to speak up and ask for help. So are the Missouri school districts taking things overboard by banning these relationships? I can see where protecting children is necessary and online relationships can become inappropriate. My opinion is that the vast majority of teachers and students would use the tool for beneficial and productive purposes. However because communication becomes easier it can be easy to think of your teacher as a friend and become more personal with them. Also liked we talked about in my communications class with CMC messages can be misinterpreted. Which could also create a problem.

I think every school district should have its own policies and regulations with about whether students and teachers should interact through these social networking sites. In Missouri's case because of the student teacher sexual relationships that have happened I believe they do need to do something about online communication. I also agree with the story in CNN that there are predators out there who are using online communication with their students for the wrong reason and they will find a way to do so even if there are laws passed. Are online student teacher relationships a good new way of communicating or are they pose an issue?

Online relationships

Throughout the summer I experienced some factors of an online relationship. My boyfriend, of only two months at the time, got signed for the Milwaukee Brewers and had to leave for Arizona. He left in the first week of June and wasn't going to be returning home until the first week of September. We planned to stay together and talk everyday.

It is easy with someone you already know what they look like and whats its like to be with them to not have anxious feelings or doubt. However, I would assume that starting a relationship online not knowing the full truth about the other person or what they look like would be very difficult.

I knew I liked my boyfriend but it was had to talk on the phone everyday because of long distance and our cell phone plans didn't allow us free calling until after nine at night. The three hour time difference made it difficult to because when he was finally allowed to talk on the phone for free I was ready for bed. So we had to find other ways to communicate. We used text, e mails, and AOL Instant Messenger. These mean of communication made it easy for us to stay in touch. However for three months we experienced what others might with an online relationship.

I feel like with online relationships you can say what you want and its much easier to do then if you were in person. I never really knew if my boyfriend really felt the way he did because even though he would tell me, he wasn't here to show me. Actions speak louder than words! Also I went through what others might experience with online relationships, the anticipation and anxiety of meeting that person. I had to ask myself some questions about my relationship. It seemed that we got closer while he was away realizing how much we truly liked each other. We would talk online we would talk about how amazing it would be when we would see each other again and what our whole semester at school would be like. This all seemed amazing through text but I was so nervous and scared for the reality of it. I would think what if it wasn't that way when he comes home? What if we don't feel the same way about each other once we are in person? What if he can express how he feels about me in words face to face? These are feelings that happen when people who meet online decide to meet. It has to be difficult for a relationship to make it through that stage. My expectation of what my relationship was going to be, at this point were very high.

i found that there were some troubles with not talking in person or on the phone. Not being able to hear his voice. There were miss communications every once in a while. Because of this we did get into a couple arguments. Its hard to trust and believe everything when you cant hear the tone of their voice as they speak or the expression on their face. It creates a complex, well at least for me it did, of always wondering, worrying, thinking, and never really knowing.

Then there was the physical contact just felling and knowing hes there. Everyone needs that comfort feeling, that hug or kiss. My boyfriend always texts me "MUAH" it cute but it will never be a real kiss. I want to reference the article my class read about senses with online relationships compared to in person relationships. This article touched every subject of how it really feels or should I say doesn't feel with online relationshipshttp://http//www-usr.rider.edu/~suler/psycyber/showdown.html#touching.





In my experience, although we are not a true online relationship, having to spend three months with just my computer and phone was not a real relationship. It is much easier to have an in person relationship. Were you can see, feel, hear, and know everything you need to about the other person. In the end when my boyfriend returned home, as nervous as I was, he did not let me down. We are still together but I am so much more confident in his feelings for me because I can see him, hear his voice, and watch his actions.

The episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer that we watched in class on Wednesday was very entertaining but not completely superficial. If the writes were trying to convey a message about the role of computers in our lives this was a creative way to do so. The whole concept of a monster, demon, or whatever you want to call him, living and acting through a computer gave me an the impression of how computers can really consume ones life.

Although the computer is informational and has many good uses, this episode allowed me to see the negatives of the role a computer plays. No longer do we need to use books why spend our time searching for the information one would need in a book when you can search the web and timely. As they said in the episode, "Information is not bound. Reality is virtual you're not alive without it." Its a little scary to think that people are so addicted and rely so heavily on a computer that they wouldn't be "alive" without it. The episode also showed how even ten years ago when the episodes were made, that computers were prevalent and technology was growing.

The episode showed web cams picking up pictures of Buffy and tracking all her information off the computer. That is very dangerous how anyone can find your information and how information about someone you need to know something about may not even be correct. People are hiding behind their computers and can be anyone they want to be as Malcolm did. The episode was a great way to see how on line relationships can happen and the good and bad with them. You never know who can find you and who you are really getting involved with.

I feel if the writers were trying to convey a message about the Internet and computers, not only do they take over peoples lives but people are completely manipulated by technology. Also in the episode it gave me the idea that computer as handy as they can be they do not contain all knowledge. Even having files on a computer which may seem so efficient and better then all the paper it was not enough to tell the nurse in the episode that a boy was allergic to penicillin. The episode made me think about how computers can contain viruses and if your computer gets one you could potentially lose everything you have stored on your computer. So as great as a computer may seem they are not perfect. What gave me this impression was when someone in the show said about "demon in the Internet."

The last thing I thought about while watching this episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer was how it is mind boggling how the Internet and computers are growing on us and technology even ten years ago in the episode was great, I can't even imagine ten years into the future how people will be using it. It is basically like Malcolm lived and created himself, communicated and had an identity through the Internet and computer. That is kind of how people are today. We use the computer and Internet for everything we do, to communicate, gain knowledge, find people, do work, upload and download files, and much more. The computer saves and stores everything we do. We create an identity of ourselves through our computers. And if you don't like your identity then I guess, like in the episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer, you could just be somebody else.